They arrived in Bethsaida. Some people brought a sightless man and begged Jesus to give him a healing touch. Taking him by the hand, he led him out of the village. He put spit in the man’s eyes, laid hands on him, and asked, “Do you see anything?”
He looked up. “I see men. They look like walking trees.” So, Jesus laid hands on his eyes again. The man looked hard and realized that he had recovered perfect sight; saw everything in bright, twenty-twenty focus.
Jesus sent him straight home, telling him, “Don’t enter the village.”
Mark 8:22-26
*************
Like the blind man in this passage, we needed a second touch from Jesus to heal our distorted view. All we had to do was be honest and admit that our perspective was still distorted. Jesus didn’t scold the man for not having enough faith, or for being inadequate. Jesus simply asked him what was wrong and then fixed it.
At the end of the story, after the man’s vision was perfectly restored, Jesus told him to go straight home and not to go back into the village. In our own parallel stories, we heard Jesus say, “Don’t go back into….”
We each heard a different ending to that sentence, based on our own uniquely personal experience. For all of us, it was a moment of truth. If we wanted to enjoy our total Tetelestai Recovery and be comfortable in our New Normal, we would not be able to return to that person, place, or thing which was certain to pull us back into our distortions.
In the original Greek language, the word for the phrase “It is finished”is Tetelestai.
I was introduced to the word Tetelestai one day when I was well into my fourth year of permanent healing from addiction.
It was during a year-long court battle which had been a residual consequence from my old life. The day I appeared in court to hear the verdict and receive my sentence, I claimed this scripture and the word Tetelestai over my case. I was relieved by the peace it held and became willing to accept whatever God had in store for me, even if it meant a year in prison.
I prayed this scripture and acknowledged the fact that God had already redeemed me. He had made me a new creation by healing me from addiction. As I was praying that morning, God was working on the judge. He gave the judge an insight into something that no one else had seen…
I was born into a two-parent alcoholic home and struggled for decades with drug and alcohol dependence. I started drinking as a small child and was a daily drug user by age twelve. I was blessed with a willfully strong intellect and despite my addiction issues, went to college, started a family, and became a successful entrepreneur. By age twenty-six, my occasional, yet increasingly frequent business, relationship, and legal problems caused me to seek relief from my struggle with drugs and alcohol.
I had an intellectual concept of a spiritual energy (Higher Power) and over the next twenty-seven years, I cycled in and out of sobriety, with the assistance of 12-step recovery meetings and multiple treatment institutions. In that twenty-seven-year period I worked steps, had sponsors and sponsees, attended meetings, worked service jobs and attended counseling. Despite what some would say was a strong recovery program, I continued to relapse with multiple auto wrecks, work accidents, play injuries, DUI’s, loss of relationships, divorce, and spiritual discourse. Consequences continued to mount and got more severe. I agonized over what I was doing wrong and often asked myself, “Why can’t I seem to get it? Why can’t I stay clean and sober?”
Bouncing from program to program I became active in four different 12-step programs and had a daily ritual of meetings to attend. I continued to relapse again and again over resentments, old acquaintances, the “disease”, and the never-ending discussions and excitement about the glory of the ‘good ole days’. My angst would grow until I would try a different drug or go back to my good old friend alcohol.
Faith in God or my version of a Higher Power, became shaken, questioned, and eventually dismissed.
And the God of all grace, who called you to His eternal glory in Christ, after you have suffered a little while, will Himself restore you and make you strong, firm and steadfast. 1 Peter 5:10
***********************
This came as a shock to those of us who grew up in the psycho-babble era, where therapists were gods who slung letter-label disorders at us like lightning bolts. Most of us had been zapped by at least one label or another which altered our identity. Sadly, that movement brought such a self-defeated attitude; many of us doubted the power of the cross over our disorders.
Thankfully, after receiving the message of Christ’s finished work, we concluded that our dysfunctional labels need not remain our identity.
We claimed the powerful promise from Romans 8:37 concerning our sense of powerlessness:
In all these things we are more than conquerors through Christ who loved us.
We subjected our past trauma to the truth found in Romans 8:28:
We know that all things work together for the good of those who love Christ, who have been called according to His purpose.
Paul didn’t write ‘some things’ or ‘the good things’. No, he said that all things, even the least expected or most traumatic things, will work together for our good and for the Kingdom’s expansion project.
We realized that it wouldn’t benefit the Kingdom if its soldiers and ambassadors were traumatized, weak, and frail (either mentally or physically). No military unit would succeed with a platoon of disabled soldiers charging in to take a hill. Fighters in poor condition would be counter-productive to the cause. When charging into enemy territory, only the healthiest, strongest, and well-trained are called up to active duty.
Knowing that God has called us up to active duty, we also trust that He has given us health, strength, and solid training. We have discovered the spiritual law of the Kingdom where trauma turns to triumph and frailty turns to strength.
Then the Lord said to Gideon, “There are still too many men. Take them down to the water and I will test them for you there. If I say, ‘This man will go with you,’ he will go. But if I say, ‘That one will not go with you,’ he will not go.”
************************
As you fulfill your mission and follow the call of God on your life, you sometimes encounter the loss of support upon which you had previously relied.
As you seek to fulfill the objectives God has set before you, a curious pattern seems to emerge. Many, who join you with passionate enthusiasm in the beginning, drop out before the project is completed.
While the world tells you that there is strength in numbers, your experience tells you otherwise. Time and time again, you have watched as friends and colleagues are called by God to other pursuits, while you are left to wonder how you will ever fulfill your mission without them.
You, like Gideon, are sometimes overwhelmed with the size of the battle in relation to the number of warriors in your company. However, you trust that God is the Commander of Angel Armies, so whatever you lack in human support, you receive in abundance from the spirit realm.
You understand that your journey is unique to your destiny and design. You realize that God has choreographed your life experiences to mesh with the talents and gifts you possess in order to fulfill the mission for which you were created.
While there are many who admire you, and hundreds who applaud you, only a few will actually go with you.
Little by little, God has removed your support system of humans so that your reliance remains on Him. When the battle is over and victory is won, you will not be tempted to give credit to other humans or take credit for yourself.
As you watch the number of workers decrease, you must fight against anxious thoughts which breed fear and worry.
You must dismiss feelings of rejection or abandonment, and choose rather to be grateful for the time of support you received.
When Gideon was first called, he struggled with a sense of inadequacy and cowardice. God brought many soldier volunteers to his side, to bolster his courage and boost his confidence. That was their only purpose, and once Gideon was on board and ready, God removed those props, one by one, until only a few remained.
Not every soldier was destined to go into battle with Gideon. In the same manner, not every person who joins your journey will be called to go the distance.
Not everyone can go where you are going. Each has their own call to follow. God brings many wonderful people into your life, to bolster your courage and strengthen your resolve.
You are grateful for their support and you remain gracious when the time comes for them to move on.
This book is dedicated to the members of Tetelestai Recovery who meet every Friday evening in the Lansing Correctional Facility.
The profound insights and personal experiences shared between inmates and volunteers in this lively discussion group have been the inspiration for this sequel to the original Tetelestai Recovery text published in 2019: Tetelestai Recovery Finding Total Recovery in the Words of Christ, “It is Finished!”
Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid.
John 14:27
***********************************
Jesus gave us this promise of peace, translated from the original word shalom, meaning: wholeness; nothing missing; nothing broken. Therefore, if we failed to experience it, we needed to know why.
**********************************
Was He a liar? Did He tease us with hope and then pull it away like Lucy holding the football in the Charlie Brown cartoon?
We developed resentment toward this Higher Power who seemingly yanked away our hope, time after time. If He controlled the universe, why didn’t He just snap His fingers and make all our misery disappear?
We questioned Him and His ways. We saw other people receive deliverance and healing from their dysfunctions and we were jealous. We finally concluded that the odds of a miracle landing on us were about the same as a rose petal falling from the sky and landing on our heads.
We knew we couldn’t raise our hopes for a miracle of our own if it was simply a cosmic lottery. We were driven to figure out what we could do to make it happen. We had been taught all our lives that a person gets what they deserve. We feared our relapses and failures had deemed us unworthy.
We knew how to work in the natural realm to get what we wanted. We worked hard. We had built personal empires and seen our own efforts succeed in other areas of life. This made it extremely difficult to understand why we couldn’t succeed in our efforts to maintain consistent sobriety.
We wanted to work for recovery and thus, control the results. We wanted to work for it, so we could own it. We wanted to know we had earned our sobriety. We wanted to receive accolades for how courageous we had been. We wanted to know it had come to us honestly, through hard work and perseverance.
Tragically, we discovered that our work just didn’t work.
The upside-down declarations of a fallen world rang out loud and clear:
Trauma causes permanent damage.
Don’t get your hopes up or you will be disappointed.
Nothing gets better; everything is getting worse.
Life will kick you down.
You are growing more weak, frail, and overwhelmed.
The world’s message was abrupt and hopeless: The end result of life is death.
The inauguration of triumph within Christ’s victory cheer, “Tetelestai!” turned these statements right side up. Much like the development of a photograph from negative filmstrip, black became white, white became black, and color emerged, as the world was submerged in the bright red solution of Jesus’ blood.
The law was fulfilled, the curtain was torn, and the New Covenant eliminated the curse, opening the floodgates of blessing for all. The responsibility of the covenant rested solely on the finished work of Jesus. No more sacrifice could outperform the one which announced, “It is finished!” His declaration broke the curse and banished the old covenant of law. Blessings became contingent on Christ’s obedience rather than our own. We found within that realm of grace, the script was flipped, and hope was born.
For forty years, from the time Peter watched his Savior and friend leave this world, airlifted by a fanfare of angels, he had been on a journey of enlightenment. He had become painfully aware of just how upside-down this natural world really was. He had learned, through the power of the Holy Spirit, to walk in a supernatural existence, free from natural limitations. He personally encountered events in which prison led to freedom, death led to life, and sickness led to health. An angel had walked him out of a maximum-security prison. People were raised from the dead on his watch. Some were healed when his shadow passed over them. When Jesus told Peter he would be doing greater miracles that the ones he had seen his Teacher do, He wasn’t exaggerating!
Peter recognized this world for what it was: an upside-down creation waiting to be turned right-side-up. Peter walked upright for many years, against the grain, in an upside-down world where most people just didn’t get it.
We wondered if Peter realized the significance of his choice to die upside-down. From that perspective, looking out on his crowd of accusers, who appeared to be hanging by their feet to a dusty sky, he was given a glimpse of how distorted one’s viewpoint could be, when looking at things upside-down.
When Jesus was spotted by His friends, coming toward the boat, they first thought He was a ghost. He knew what they were thinking. Although they should have been relieved to see Him, they were, in fact, terrified instead. He saw the horror in their eyes and realized they weren’t recognizing Him for who He was.
We recall times when we were unaware that Jesus was approaching, and we became frightened by our own misperceptions. We saw death approaching, but in the end, it proved to be the Author of Life. The disciples thought they were seeing a ghost. And much like those young men, we too become afraid of what He represents. Some fear He will leave them. Others fear He will prohibit their self-expression. Some fear He will demand too much or create too much controversy. Many of us encountered a fear of Jesus, not fully understanding who He was or why He’d come.
Jesus comes to us in different forms. Sometimes He comes in the supernatural realm as an unmistakable tingle of the Great Spirit. Other times He approaches through the Presence of other addicts and inmates whom we fondly refer to as our cell-siblings. Addiction, incarceration, disease, and anxiety were some of the worst storms in our lives, and we were sure some of these issues would be the death of us. Yet, in the midst of these storms, Jesus appeared and offered the opportunity to take a leap of faith and join Him in the supernatural.
In the Sacred Text account, one of the men in the boat, named Peter, asked Jesus to let him come out and walk on the water alongside Him. Jesus of course said, “Sure! Come on out. The water’s fine.” Peter lunged toward the side of the boat as it was rocking and lurching, climbed cautiously over the edge, and slowly lowered his weight onto the swirling liquid. If Jesus was a fraud, the next few seconds would have been the moment of truth. In former miracles, the people who were healed and delivered could have been in cahoots with Him on some elaborate hoax. However, walking on top of water, and inviting another human being to join Him would have been impossible to pull off, had it been a ruse.
The interesting part of this story is when it is taught as an object lesson in some churches, the point always seems to hover over the fact that for a split-second Peter took his eyes off Jesus and began to sink below the surface of the waves. Many preachers belabor the point that Peter lacked faith. We disagree!
There were 11 other men in the boat who didn’t even ask if they could come out onto the water. Peter had faith! Whether he was completely successful in his faith walk or not, he was the only one with the intuition to ask if he could get out of the boat. He was the one who believed in Jesus’ ability to empower him to do it. He knew that in the midst of the storm, the safest place to be was with Jesus. In that moment of clarity, Peter suddenly received a divine revelation. Through this text, we receive the same revelation in our storms. We need not remain powerless and desperate. We are called to function alongside our King, even when natural laws dictate otherwise. Believers can overpower the Natural with the Supernatural.
The power in the spirit realm is faith, and Peter’s faith was increasing exponentially with every risk. His faith account was small, but it was growing. When Jesus asked him “Oh you have such little faith, why did you doubt me?” He was simply letting Peter know that as his faith increased, so would his ability to maintain his position of power in the Spirit realm. Pointing out that Peter had ‘little’ faith was not a reprimand but rather, an encouragement that when his faith grew bigger, it would become more reliable, enabling him to fulfill his call.
As we leveled up in our new normal, we had to adopt the same type of mindset with our life choices as we did for driving on muddy country roads. Our decisions and actions needed to be precisely calibrated in order to achieve the results we wanted. Just as it would be foolish to see how close to the ditch we could drive without sliding off the road, it was also foolish to see how close we could get to temptation without giving in.
In our leveled-up position, we learned that every action started with a choice. And every choice carried an equal and opposite result. In other words, every choice carried both a yes and a no decision.
If we said yes to sobriety, we said no to the chaos and destruction we once lived. And visa-versa. If we said yes to a drink or drug, we said no to hope and sanity. When we said yes to thinking out our choices, we said no to making the same dumb decisions over and over, expecting different results.
To level-up, we had to accept our own responsibility for the choices and events of our lives. We had to realize that our decisions, even in little things, mattered. Whether it was getting a good deal on a laptop we suspected was stolen, or working the system to get benefits we didn’t really qualify for, every decision set off a chain reaction of negative results and consequences.
We evaluated some of our individual experiences and shared them with the group.
One member who had been an addiction to porn, shared his decision-making process when it came to watching television. He knew which shows would trigger lustful thoughts, so he simply chose not to watch them. He chose instead to watch sports, cooking shows, and educational programs like Nova. He said yes to living free from his addiction which meant he said no to shows that triggered him. Each time he made that choice, he placed himself into a position of freedom. He continues to pursue his destiny using the wisdom God has given. He has leveled up into a mature, godly man who demonstrates great leadership skills.
Another member of the group shared about self-esteem issues. From childhood, he had been trying to cope with the confusion of trauma, unaware of what to call it. He struggled with feelings of unworthiness and was unable to feel a sense of value. That all changed when he made the choice to learn about trauma and its effects. He chose to develop a relationship with Jesus, his Healer. He made a choice to forgive and move away from the pain. Because he said yes to openness, and no to suffering in silence, he now operates in a position of power and serves as an advocate for others. He has the wisdom of God and the heart of a servant.
Another member shared about his past life of uncontrollable rage. He spoke about feeling as if he had no choice when it overtook him. His experience with rage was like driving on a slippery, muddy road at full speed, headed straight for the ditch, and unable to stop. It was hard for us to believe he had ever struggled with rage. This was a man who carried the joy of the Lord on his face. His smile was contagious, his demeanor was gracious, and he radiated positive energy whenever he walked into the room. He often spoke of love and forgiveness as if it were his lifeline. He had made a conscious choice to forgive whenever he was wronged. He refused to carry a grudge, but instead, chose to walk in love. He said no to rage and yes to compassion. Forgiveness and joy were no longer second nature to him; they were his new normal.
Finding Total Recovery in the Words of Christ, "It is Finished!" 