Yes and No

As we leveled up in our new normal, we had to adopt the same type of mindset with our life choices as we did for driving on muddy country roads.  Our decisions and actions needed to be precisely calibrated in order to achieve the results we wanted.  Just as it would be foolish to see how close to the ditch we could drive without sliding off the road, it was also foolish to see how close we could get to temptation without giving in.  

In our leveled-up position, we learned that every action started with a choice. And every choice carried an equal and opposite result. In other words, every choice carried both a yes and a no decision.

If we said yes to sobriety, we said no to the chaos and destruction we once lived. And visa-versa.  If we said yes to a drink or drug, we said no to hope and sanity. When we said yes to thinking out our choices, we said no to making the same dumb decisions over and over, expecting different results.

To level-up, we had to accept our own responsibility for the choices and events of our lives. We had to realize that our decisions, even in little things, mattered.   Whether it was getting a good deal on a laptop we suspected was stolen, or working the system to get benefits we didn’t really qualify for, every decision set off a chain reaction of negative results and consequences.

We evaluated some of our individual experiences and shared them with the group.

One member who had been an addiction to porn, shared his decision-making process when it came to watching television.  He knew which shows would trigger lustful thoughts, so he simply chose not to watch them.  He chose instead to watch sports, cooking shows, and educational programs like Nova. He said yes to living free from his addiction which meant he said no to shows that triggered him.  Each time he made that choice, he placed himself into a position of freedom. He continues to pursue his destiny using the wisdom God has given.  He has leveled up into a mature, godly man who demonstrates great leadership skills. 

Another member of the group shared about self-esteem issues. From childhood, he had been trying to cope with the confusion of trauma, unaware of what to call it. He struggled with feelings of unworthiness and was unable to feel a sense of value.  That all changed when he made the choice to learn about trauma and its effects. He chose to develop a relationship with Jesus, his Healer.  He made a choice to forgive and move away from the pain. Because he said yes to openness, and no to suffering in silence, he now operates in a position of power and serves as an advocate for others. He has the wisdom of God and the heart of a servant.

Another member shared about his past life of uncontrollable rage.  He spoke about feeling as if he had no choice when it overtook him. His experience with rage was like driving on a slippery, muddy road at full speed, headed straight for the ditch, and unable to stop.  It was hard for us to believe he had ever struggled with rage. This was a man who carried the joy of the Lord on his face. His smile was contagious, his demeanor was gracious, and he radiated positive energy whenever he walked into the room.  He often spoke of love and forgiveness as if it were his lifeline.  He had made a conscious choice to forgive whenever he was wronged. He refused to carry a grudge, but instead, chose to walk in love. He said no to rage and yes to compassion. Forgiveness and joy were no longer second nature to him; they were his new normal.